Slave to Tivo

I have so much crap backed up on my Tivo that it's starting to stress me out. Stress me out! Much like my giant pile of unread magazines, it mocks me as I pretend I have time to read and watch all this crap. There IS no time! I need to take a month-long vacation just so I can catch up on all my TV and magazines. How sad is that? I feel like a little planet, spinning and trying to do my thing, with the TV programs and magazines whizzing past my head like a storm of asteroids and comets. Funny thing is, I KNOW I could just delete the TV programs and recycle the magazines, and problem solved. But what a waste! I actually like all these things and am really starting to resent the fact that I have to work for a living. Why couldn't I have been born a trust fund baby?

Okay, maybe I wouldn't want to be a trust fund baby -- but a little independent wealth would be nice. Until then, It's off to the shower and the rest of the daily grind. Ugh, I wonder what today's commute home is going to be like? I can see it now -- I-80 jammed to the gills with people leaving "early," meaning any time between noon and 6 (the new "rush hour" around here) to head for Reno, Tahoe & the like. LEAVE NOW, YOU SONS OF BITCHES! NOW! GET UP, GET UP, GET UP AND HIT THE ROAD SO I DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOU ON MY WAY HOME TODAY!

Allllllllllrighty, then. What the hell is up with this nation of Griswolds, anyway? Road trip my ass. Road trips are for weekdays when everyone else is busy going about their normal daily business -- not holidays! But I'm not bitter.